So... this guy (G) comes into the gym in jeans and a pair of all-stars. He's bugged me (J) before, just for the record -- the one other time he's been there. Comes up to me, asks if I know if you can check out shorts. That's right. Shorts.
J: I dunno.
G: Do I know where the trainer is? (He means the student on facebook behind the desk, making sure you don't wear street shoes.)
J: I dunno.
G: Do you need a spot? (Was doing Lynne, so I was benching)
J: No. No -- no, I'm ok. Thanks.
He's only about Becky's height, so he goes over to do pull-ups -- pushes the stool underneath the bar, climbs up onto it, jumps from there up to the bar. Does one pull up, drops back onto the stool from the "up" position. Does another. And another. And about 6 more.
Decides he's going to do deadlifts, but asks me first if I need the mirror, because, you know, it's between the bench and the rack he'd be on.
J: No. Don't need the mirror -- you can take it.
I go do some pull ups in the other room, come back, write them down.
G: You have a program?
J: Yeah.
G: That it?
J: Yeah.
G: Can I see it?
J: No. It wouldn't make sense, and it's my calendar.
G: Oh, then never mind.
J: Ok.
Guy does some deadlift warmups: Feet 6" apart, no load on the bar. I bench. Guy goes and puts some chalk on his hands.
Guy comes back and does some more 20kilo deadlift warmups. Then, he sets the bar back up on the rack and loads it up to 65 kilo (144lb).
Deadlifts: just like the pullups. One at a time. Reset the grip each time. DROP the weight each time. Not from full extension, but enough that it bounces.
J benches.
G: So, do you do other stuff than just bench press?
J: Yeah.
G: Like what?
J: Sigh. Alles.
G: Everything?
J: yeah. Everything.
G: Everything, every day?
J: No. Not everything every day. Different thigns on different days.
G: Oh you're here a lot?
J: 5 or 6 days a week.
G: Oh. that's pretty good.
J: eh.
J goes and does pull ups. Comes back cursing under his breath everytime Guy drops those heavy 145lb deadlifts.
G: You do deadlifts?
J: yeah.
G: In those shoes? (nike running shoes)
J: yeah.
G: they don't have that great a sole for deadlifts.
J: I always train in these shoes.
G: But for dead lifts, you can't do that much weight.
J: They don't bother me.
G: But the more weight you put on, the more they wobble.
OMG!!! I am so annoyed/entertained right now it's horrible/awesome! I was laughing so loud, pounding my desk!!! He's all "you can't lift much in those" and you're all "I can lift YOU AND YOUR WEIGHT, pipsqueak!" HAHAHAHA!
I'm sure I can't top that. Part of the reason I can't is because it seems that I give off a "don't talk to me" vibe when I'm in the gym - which is fine because I don't really go to the gym to talk anyway.....
At least 2/3 of the time, I do Crossfit at the local YMCA. The clientele is diverse in their fitness abilities and fitness IQs. My weird gym stuff all happens there.
Episode 1:
Chris is doing the "Grace" workout. (30 C&J for time) Dude I've never seen before comes and stands behind me mid-set as if he's going to spot me. Really he's going to get hurt if I fail and have to drop the bar behind me. This is making me nervous, so I put the bar down and rest hoping he'll go away. He comes up to me and says, "Way to lift brother!!!" and gives me five. I literally did not know what to do with that, so I didn't respond. To myself: "I don't know if I'm your brother or not, but I hope no one else saw that!" Of course all of the people I know at the gym did see that and now I'm everyone's "brother".
Episode 2:
The YMCA used to have a speed bag in the weightroom which almost no one ever used. A younger looking guy shows up and he's hitting the bag, doing some pseudo kick-boxing stuff, etc. (It doesn't appear that he knows what he's doing based on his technique. The noise is also irritating the crap out of me.)
The mounting for the bag breaks and it falls on the floor.
I'm happy about this.
This kid gets some tools from the front desk and spends the next hour working on repairing the speed bag. He gets it hung up again and is setting up to continue his workout. He hits the bag once and it falls on the floor again. So awesome.
Episode 3:
This is more a combination of multiple experiences. As mentioned before, I do Crossfit at the local Y. I'm the only one there that ever does all these "weird lifts" like C&J, front squat, KB swings, snatch, etc. I cannot count how many times I've noticed someone watching what I'm doing. That person will rarely talk to me in the weightroom. They wait until we are in the locker room or shower area and then start asking questions or making comments.
This is a clear violation of one of the most important unwritten rules of locker room etiquette. Everyone should know this rule, but in case anyone is unfamiliar:
If you are in the locker room and you do not have any pants on, you are not allowed to talk.
6 comments:
So... this guy (G) comes into the gym in jeans and a pair of all-stars. He's bugged me (J) before, just for the record -- the one other time he's been there. Comes up to me, asks if I know if you can check out shorts. That's right. Shorts.
J: I dunno.
G: Do I know where the trainer is? (He means the student on facebook behind the desk, making sure you don't wear street shoes.)
J: I dunno.
G: Do you need a spot? (Was doing Lynne, so I was benching)
J: No. No -- no, I'm ok. Thanks.
He's only about Becky's height, so he goes over to do pull-ups -- pushes the stool underneath the bar, climbs up onto it, jumps from there up to the bar. Does one pull up, drops back onto the stool from the "up" position. Does another.
And another.
And about 6 more.
Decides he's going to do deadlifts, but asks me first if I need the mirror, because, you know, it's between the bench and the rack he'd be on.
J: No. Don't need the mirror -- you can take it.
I go do some pull ups in the other room, come back, write them down.
G: You have a program?
J: Yeah.
G: That it?
J: Yeah.
G: Can I see it?
J: No. It wouldn't make sense, and it's my calendar.
G: Oh, then never mind.
J: Ok.
Guy does some deadlift warmups: Feet 6" apart, no load on the bar. I bench. Guy goes and puts some chalk on his hands.
Guy comes back and does some more 20kilo deadlift warmups. Then, he sets the bar back up on the rack and loads it up to 65 kilo (144lb).
Deadlifts: just like the pullups. One at a time. Reset the grip each time. DROP the weight each time. Not from full extension, but enough that it bounces.
J benches.
G: So, do you do other stuff than just bench press?
J: Yeah.
G: Like what?
J: Sigh. Alles.
G: Everything?
J: yeah. Everything.
G: Everything, every day?
J: No. Not everything every day. Different thigns on different days.
G: Oh you're here a lot?
J: 5 or 6 days a week.
G: Oh. that's pretty good.
J: eh.
J goes and does pull ups. Comes back cursing under his breath everytime Guy drops those heavy 145lb deadlifts.
G: You do deadlifts?
J: yeah.
G: In those shoes? (nike running shoes)
J: yeah.
G: they don't have that great a sole for deadlifts.
J: I always train in these shoes.
G: But for dead lifts, you can't do that much weight.
J: They don't bother me.
G: But the more weight you put on, the more they wobble.
J: I hadn't noticed.
G: Oh. yeah. I'm sure they're fine.
J: (benches)
You guys get this stuff in your gym?
OMG!!! I am so annoyed/entertained right now it's horrible/awesome! I was laughing so loud, pounding my desk!!! He's all "you can't lift much in those" and you're all "I can lift YOU AND YOUR WEIGHT, pipsqueak!" HAHAHAHA!
That's funny stuff.
I'm sure I can't top that.
Part of the reason I can't is because it seems that I give off a "don't talk to me" vibe when I'm in the gym - which is fine because I don't really go to the gym to talk anyway.....
At least 2/3 of the time, I do Crossfit at the local YMCA. The clientele is diverse in their fitness abilities and fitness IQs. My weird gym stuff all happens there.
Episode 1:
Chris is doing the "Grace" workout. (30 C&J for time)
Dude I've never seen before comes and stands behind me mid-set as if he's going to spot me. Really he's going to get hurt if I fail and have to drop the bar behind me. This is making me nervous, so I put the bar down and rest hoping he'll go away. He comes up to me and says, "Way to lift brother!!!" and gives me five.
I literally did not know what to do with that, so I didn't respond. To myself: "I don't know if I'm your brother or not, but I hope no one else saw that!"
Of course all of the people I know at the gym did see that and now I'm everyone's "brother".
Episode 2:
The YMCA used to have a speed bag in the weightroom which almost no one ever used. A younger looking guy shows up and he's hitting the bag, doing some pseudo kick-boxing stuff, etc. (It doesn't appear that he knows what he's doing based on his technique. The noise is also irritating the crap out of me.)
The mounting for the bag breaks and it falls on the floor.
I'm happy about this.
This kid gets some tools from the front desk and spends the next hour working on repairing the speed bag. He gets it hung up again and is setting up to continue his workout. He hits the bag once and it falls on the floor again. So awesome.
Episode 3:
This is more a combination of multiple experiences.
As mentioned before, I do Crossfit at the local Y. I'm the only one there that ever does all these "weird lifts" like C&J, front squat, KB swings, snatch, etc. I cannot count how many times I've noticed someone watching what I'm doing. That person will rarely talk to me in the weightroom. They wait until we are in the locker room or shower area and then start asking questions or making comments.
This is a clear violation of one of the most important unwritten rules of locker room etiquette. Everyone should know this rule, but in case anyone is unfamiliar:
If you are in the locker room and you do not have any pants on, you are not allowed to talk.
Hi five brother!
OMG Chris The Todd works out at your gym??? Weird...=)
Also, I nearly fell off my chair laughing about the "one hit wonder" punching bag.
I have thoroughly appreciated this entire thread. Lots of laughing out loud. (LOLOL).
Especially Episode 2.
Post a Comment